Tyler P. DeMarco
May 16, 1997 – February 23, 2010
They say ‘Takotsubo Cardiomyopathy’ (Broken Heart Syndrome) is a temporary heart condition brought on by stress. Temporary, I think not!
Ten years ago our hearts were not just broken, they were destroyed. On this date we watched our beautiful, talented, loving, smart, courageous and amazing Tyler slip from existence; forever altering ours.
The peace and joy we once knew is afflicted by irremediable sorrow – it cleaves like a vice in our daily struggle with happy, beautiful memories that conflict with the four years of unknowns, difficult treatments, terrible illness, wins, loss and the defeat that brought us here to what is now, our reality.
“I LOVE MY LIFE!” … were Tyler’s words – words proclaimed regularly throughout his life well before he ever became ill. Tyler was a strong, thoughtful, independent boy with above average intellect whose humor and quips rivaled adult stand-up. Tyler was a boy who loved deeply with sensitivity, compassion and empathy. Both our boys have these amazing qualities and for this, we are blessed.
We’re alive, sort of, and try our best to move forward with wonderful, beautiful, happy memories that are both a treasured blessing and a curse. Our mind replays the images of Tyler’s strong, brave, happy face contrasted by the pain, worry and fear of what we knew and the horrors of our experience. We’re bombarded by those images – what cancer took from Tyler, what cancer took from us, and what it did to all of our dreams and expectations. Our minds relive the obstacles and setbacks that changed the course of not one, but two childhoods – adoring brothers, best friends and lifelong confidants. Two well behaved and amazing boys who worked hard, made good choices, loved deeply and made us proud. Two boys unfairly placed into a hellish nightmare unfit and unfair for any adult, let alone a child. Childhood cancer not only destroys childhood, it redefines lives – it’s a catastrophe that changes everything. It changes everyone.
A decade has now past and our altered life continues down the road of torment. It’s a constant duel in our mind, a barrage of never ending images of conflict for which there is no pause. Our memories of life, love & happiness vs. what we faced, what Tyler endured, the battles fought, the wounds sustained, the damage done, the war lost – what we all lost. There’s no fixing this kind of conflict, there’s no fixing this kind of pain. It only ends when we do. The ravages of childhood cancer should belong to no one!
– By Don DeMarco
